Why do you ask? It is because I'm FRUSTRATED beyond belief with the extremely, extremely slow progress of how fast I'm healing from the hysterectomy. I never, ever, never in my wildest imagination dreamed it would be this hard, this painful, and most especially this LONG. Top it all off with a bladder that doesn't want to work properly, if at all, and you have the makings for one very irritated human being. Just when I start to believe that I'm finally on the upward swing of feeling good, if not great, my body tells me to HOLD UP. It isn't time to start celebrating yet.
Today, I decided to go to the store for some grocery shopping even though I woke up not feeling great, but not able to pin point just exactly why I wasn't feeling good. We don't have food in this house, and I'm tired of eating out. It is expensive, fattening, and gross. I was given the all clear on Thursday, so I figure that I will be okay lifting a bag with 12 pounds of sugar in it. Got a little twinge, but I didn't think anything about it. Got to HEB (Love that store) and started my shopping. About halfway through the store KG tells me she has to go to the bathroom, so my mom takes her. I start pushing the cart, and I'm about halfway down the aisle when what decides to happen. I'm hit with such an intense pain, that my knees nearly buckle. I thought I was going to puke right there. I was so queasy. I felt like my insides were going to fall out. I'm sitting here with my feet propped up, with some of the worst cramps imaginable, a belly that looks and feels like I'm 5 months pregnant, feet and legs that are swollen, and stabbing pains in my belly. I'm to the point where I wonder what is wrong with me. Why me? What did I do to deserve this? Why in the world did I have this hysterectomy? Did I make the right decision?
If anybody asks from here on out, I'm perfectly fine. I'm doing great. I'm sure nobody wants to hear the truth. You want the truth, then you read here. I will lay it all on the line here.
I rearranged my college schedule. I dropped my chemistry class in exchange for an intro to sociology. It is just so hard for me to go to college in the evening especially if Hubster finds a class to take for 3 months during the fall. He is looking. He only needs 90 more active duty days to get 100% GI Bill instead of the 70% we have right now. He also is going to be gone for 2 weeks in August courtesy of the Navy. He gets another paid vacation to California. He said he wasn't visiting anybody this time.
TB loved camp, and I could tell. He actually talked about it. I'm so glad. I got to looking at his FB page, and he has added a bunch of new friends. They are mainly girls. I'm very lucky to have some good kids. I couldn't be prouder of them.
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